It’s easy to fall into a routine that’s easy and comfortable because it’s what has always been done. But sometimes we need to get pushed out of our comfort zones in order to do the work God really calls us to do. That’s what happens to the members of the Heavenly Hugs Prayer Shawl Ministry in Sharon J. Mondragón’s debut novel, The Unlikely Yarn of the Dragon Lady (Kregel Publications).
Introduce us to
the Heavenly Hugs Prayer Shawl Ministry. Who are the members and what is the
mission of the ministry? The Heavenly Hugs Prayer Shawl Ministry has met from 9:30-11:30 every
Wednesday morning for the past seven years to knit prayer shawls. They knit in
the peace and quiet of the Prayer Chapel of Hope of Glory Community Church,
praying silently. Margaret is the self-appointed leader of the group (she tends
to take charge of whatever she’s involved in). Jane, a mother of teens, gives
Rose a ride from Fair Meadows Retirement Community every week. Fran is a recent
widow learning to knit as she begins to emerge from the fog of grief.
The purpose of their
ministry is to make shawls to comfort and encourage people who are ill,
bereaved or otherwise going through a difficult time. They pray as they knit to
infuse the shawls with a sense of the presence of God. The shawls are a
tangible expression of God’s love and care—a hug from God.
The prayer shawl
knitters have been meeting in the church’s prayer chapel, but their routine
gets turned upside down. What happened? Their pastor, Father Pete, has been tasked with either reviving
Hope of Glory or shutting it down. If he were a betting man, the bishop would
put his money on closing the church. Father Pete, however, isn’t someone who
gives up easily. He’s tried all the usual ways of stirring things up—sprucing
up the church, expanding the children’s ministry, small groups, to no avail.
At a recent clergy
conference, however, Father Pete gets a brainwave. The bishop tells the pastors
in attendance that people are not coming to church anymore, therefore, they
need to take church to the people. Father Pete decides that a great way to do
this would be to send Hope of Glory (in the form of the Heavenly Hugs Prayer
Shawl Ministry) out to the people who aren’t coming to church. After all, what
is as inviting and cozy as a group of knitters? He tells them that for the next
month, while work is being done in the prayer chapel, they must meet in public.
The Heavenly Hugs
also attract a few young women who want to learn to knit. Rose is delighted to
pass on this skill, but the knitting lessons upset Margaret. Not only are they
not getting much praying done when people stop by to talk to them, but teaching
knitting has never been part of their ministry. She’s convinced the ministry is
falling apart, even though some of the people they’ve talked with at the mall
start showing up at church.
What happens once
a prayer shawl is finished? How is it decided who gets a shawl? When one of the Heavenly Hugs
ladies finishes a shawl, Margaret attaches a tag with the words “Made for you
with love and prayer by the Heavenly Hugs Prayer Shawl Ministry” on one side
and “You are not alone,” followed by the church’s contact information on the
other. Then the shawl is delivered to the church, where Father Pete and the
congregation pray over it the following Sunday. The shawl is then stored in the
church office to be given out to those who request one for someone they know
and care about who is having a rough time. On occasion, Father Pete or Lucille,
the church administrator, give them to someone who has come for counseling or
support.
Why is Margaret
so focused on an arbitrary set of rules that it keeps her from seeing the
positives of knitting at the mall? For one thing, Margaret is used to being in charge. She
doesn’t like being told what to do. She invokes those arbitrary rules in order
to maintain the status quo. She likes having the prayer shawl ministry in the
neat little box of the Prayer Chapel, where nothing unexpected happens and
no-one challenges her authority.
She is also using
those rules much like the Pharisees used theirs—to keep God at arm’s length. It
looks like she’s ministering on the outside, but she’s using those rules to
keep from engaging with God. Meeting at the mall changes the way the group
ministers. It makes them aware of “the wants and needs” of a group of people
they hadn’t thought about before. Being out among the people they’re praying
for forces awareness of these needs and shakes them out of complacency. While
Rose, Fran, and Jane come to embrace this, Margaret continues to be
uncomfortable with the changes and unpredictability. She’d rather keep the
people and their problems at arm’s length, too, especially as they begin to
inch her toward facing a long-buried hurt.
After a couple of months, why is it so
difficult for Margaret to admit Father Pete may have been right in kicking the
knitters out of the prayer chapel? Why does she always have to be in control? Margaret is something of a
matriarch at Hope of Glory, the church “Dragon Lady.” She’s seen pastors come
and pastors go, but she has maintained her firm grip on “the way we’ve always
done things.” It’s a matter of pride for her to always be right. Having opposed
Father Pete, she can’t swallow her pride and admit that he was right.
This issue of
control is something I’ve thought about a great deal. There are a number of
bossy women in my life. Not being bossy myself, I’ve been perplexed about how
these women can feel so comfortable telling others what to do and always
getting their own way. Margaret’s character began as an attempt to understand
bossy women. I hoped that by getting inside her head and heart, seeing things
through her eyes, I might gain insight into the inner workings of my own bossy
women.
What I’ve discovered
is that not all bossy women have the same motivations. For some it’s about
power, the flexing of “muscles” to be able to make others do things. Others
believe they have the best ideas, so naturally, others should do as they say.
For women like Margaret, there’s an element of pride. They want everything they
do to come out in a way that reflects well on them, regardless of much
steamrolling they must do to achieve it.
For Margaret,
however, it goes even deeper. She is trying to fend something off by
controlling as much as she can. Realizing this was an epiphany for me. I
realized that I, too, had struggled with the issue of trying to protect myself
vs. trusting God with my future and my heart. I found that my bossy character
and I had common ground after all.
What happens that
finally starts to turn Margaret’s heart around? Through one of the prayer requests
at the mall, Margaret comes face-to-face with a situation which hits uncannily
close to home, a situation from which she has been running for over two
decades. This trauma has been at the bottom of her steely and desperate need to
control. She is finally moved toward change and healing when she decides to try
to save someone else from the regrets that have haunted her for over
twenty-five years.
Can you share
what the other members of the group are struggling with in their lives? Rose Harker is eighty-five,
widowed, and has relished her independence. She enjoyed her involvement at
church, her friendships with the families in her neighborhood, and driving
herself whenever she wanted to go somewhere—until she mowed down her daughter’s
mailbox while she was backing out of the driveway, that is. Her bossy daughter
thinks the best place for Rose is Fair Meadows Retirement Community, so that’s
where she’s living now. That doesn’t mean she has to like it, though. At the
beginning of the story, Rose is not adjusting well to life at Fair Meadows,
shunning new friendships and wishing she could go back to living on her own.
Jane Crenshaw is the
harried mother of three contentious teenagers—a nineteen-year-old son, Kenny,
and two daughters, Anna and Emily, who are fifteen and thirteen. Jane thought
that once troublemaker Kenny was out of the house, things would settle down,
but the girls are still intensely quarrelsome with each other and with Jane.
Kenny’s behavior has hurt Jane deeply, to the point that she is estranged from
him. Rose reminds her that she needs to forgive him, but Jane can’t see how
that will ever be possible.
Fran McMillan is
beginning to emerge from the shock of sudden bereavement. One minute she was planning
a cruise to celebrate her husband Ed’s retirement from a busy, demanding career
(he would have time for her at last!), and the next she was planning his
funeral after a heart attack. At the beginning of the story, we meet a timid
woman who is just coming out of not only the shadow of grief, but the shadow of
her husband. She’s learning to knit and has started to venture out into the
world again beyond just going to church. Knitting at the mall is out of her
comfort zone, but she braves it anyway. Who knows what’s in store for her?
You are involved
in actual prayer shawl ministry, aren’t you? Can you tell us more about it? I made my first prayer shawl in
2008. It was for myself, akin to how flight attendants tell us to put the
oxygen masks on ourselves before helping others with theirs. In 2009, I joined
my first prayer shawl group. I was, once again, the new girl at church, due to
a military move (my husband had been assigned to
The Hands of Comfort
Prayer Shawl Ministry did not meet at The Church of the Holy Comforter, but in
the café of a local health food store. The pastor wanted
us to ply our needles in public, not hidden away in the church building. People
often stopped by our table to ask what we were making or to tell us about
someone they loved who also knitted or crocheted. We were a warm and comforting
presence in that space every week.
At first, I thought
of prayer shawl making as something nice to do for hurting people, but I soon
discovered that God wanted something deeper from me. Most of the shawls I made
went into the supply at church. They were an act of faith, as I never knew who
would receive them or exactly why the shawls were needed. Then I started to
experience what I call “The Nudge,” that urge to make a shawl for a particular
person. This involved a great deal of listening as I searched for the right yarn
and pattern for each shawl. I began to pay attention to the situations that
prompted the nudge and caught a glimpse of how much God cares about fractured
relationships, unspeakable sorrow, and weariness of soul. Prayer shawl making
has become a way to draw closer to the heart of God, to see people and
situations through His eyes.
At the end of my
husband’s military career in 2014, we moved to
Do you have a new
writing project in the works? Yes, I do. I’m working on another prayer shawl novel. This
story takes place at the retirement community where my character Rose lives.
Sam Talbot is barely existing since his wife went into Memory Care at Fair
Meadows Retirement Community. Life has lost all color and meaning—until he gets
tangled up with flirtatious Jenny Alderman, crotchety crocheter Edna Booth, and
the rest of the prayer shawl group Rose is heading up at Fair Meadows. The
Woolgatherers make prayer shawls for the caretakers of folks with dementia, but
they soon find out that God has much more in mind for each of them. Jenny,
Edna, and Sam come face to face with uncomfortable truths about themselves and
are challenged to embrace new ways of living and relating to God and others.
It’s a story of love and loss, the pain of loneliness, and the power of
community.
I’m excited about
this book because I feel it’s important to reach out and support those who love
and care for people with memory issues. We tend not to want to think about this
situation because the thought of developing memory problems ourselves is
frightening. It’s deeply distressing to watch someone’s memory and function
fade. Caretakers, however, need our love, concern, and support, even if it’s
simply a listening ear and a hug from someone who can recognize them. In this
book, I hope readers will gain a sense of God’s heart for caretakers and follow
Him in loving and caring for them. The care of both memory patients and their
caretakers is truly a place where courage and kindness meet.
Visit
Sharon Mondragón’s website and blog at www.sharonjMondragón.com and follow her on Facebook (Sherry Mondragón) and Twitter (@SJ_Mondragón).
Thank
you,
Readers, here’s a link
to the book.
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5 comments:
A captivating and wonderful book which has captured my heart. Thank you for your fascinating post today. Anne in NM.
Sounds wonderful. Thank you for sharing. Blessings from WV.
Enter me in your awesome giveaway!!
Nichols SC.
I hope that you will enjoy the book and above all, that it will draw you closer to the heart of God.
I have a friend who would love this book. From the UK.
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